IMHO your question is based on faulty assumptions.
1- what lies beneath an LD woman's saying that sex "overrated, unnecessary, or unimportant"? I'll wager they mean it's not provided any pleasure/benefit for them. Or they are being passive aggressive and don't realize it, or can't stop it. Or they have a physical or emotional disorder. Or they don't care that much about staying married. You can't just take those words at face value.
2- "that didn't otherwise threaten your marriage" is something you can't know until after the damage is done. How can you guarantee you won't fall in love with the FWB or that she won't fall in love with you and create a problem for your W? How can you guarantee this won't be hurtful to your W? How can you guarantee that you'll feel good about yourself with this solution?
3- "it's either important or unimportant" is wrong. Even if a W can't bring herself to have sex with her H, it still can be a huge psychological issue, a source of great frustration and conflict, (in your case) a potential cause for your marriage to end. It's only unimportant/unnecessary if both partners agree that it is.
You have spun your problem in your posts in such a way as to lead us to your conclusion. You've tried everything, nothing works, you can't live without sex, and she's not going to provide it. We only know these things based on your interpretations. You seem to be begging this forum for permission to get a FWB instead of a D.
The only opinions that should matter in this very personal decision are yours and your wife's.
Adinva 51, S20, S18 M24 total 6/15/11-12/1/12 From IDLY to H moving out 9/15/15-3/7/17 From negotiating SA to final D at age 50 5/8/17-now: New relationship with an old friend __ Happiness is a warm puppy.
