Wife no longer in love with me - Part 4

[cam]

They really are my thoughts Finah..I hate myself and blame myself for everything that's gone wrong and the situation we are in.
I can't seem to forgive myself and move on. I can't believe I miss her so much, if I had known this pain, I would have been the best most loving husband I could have been, instead of the jerk I was.

I don't think I would do anything drastic, but it does cross my mind. I just want this to end, but i know this wound will never heal.
It's that old saying, you don't know what you had until you lose it. And i lost the best thing that ever happened to me.