Kitti, I think the reason you don't see your progress is because of what I see as a filter through which victims of childhood abuse-controll-neglect see the world. You see a distorted picture. You have been listing positives specifically eg. 2 movies in one night. An outside observer sees the facts in these posts. The key to all of this is to start seeing accurately. Focus on these objective changes that we all are seeing in your posts. You have been conditioned with "no I can't" in your past but the objective proof now is "yes I can". Keep it going. Also, on the Bible's advice keep in mind that it is advice meant to help you succeed, not to threaten you. When Satan offered Eve the fruit, fear did not work. What would have worked would have been her uderstanding that God wanted her to be happy and successful and he was giving her positive advice. Read your own posts over. They sound like a court trial of objective facts that prove you are slowly making this marriage work. The world tells you you can't fix your marriage. The facts show that's a lie; you can and you are.
