Pinning your D's behavior on him is pursuing, I would let that drop for now. The subtext is "If you come back, D will get better" which makes him responsible. He will retreat from that feeling and/or resent you for it.

When he pushes your buttons, firmly stand up for yourself. Don't argue, just don't take any crap. This may seem like its making him angry, but he will respect you for it, and he needs to respect you to want to come back.

Accuray

Married 18, Together 20, Now Divorced
M: 48, W: 50, D: 18, S: 16, D: 12
Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 7/13/11
Start Reconcile: 8/15/11
Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 5/1/2014 (Divorced)
In a New Relationship: 3/2015