Pardon me for writing this little biblical lesson. I thought it might help some of us, at least. The lesson talks about parents and siblings, but I feel it definitely applies to spouses, WASes and their families.
The Key to a Healthy Family - pt.1 Genesis 25, 27 - Unhealthy family dynamics, namely:
1. Trying to be competitive, i.e. sibling rivalry. Done through sports, then school, looks, popularity - it all revolves around competition. Sometimes between husband and wife. Competition between parents and child. College to job, or money making. Things like these also are present in the church family.
2. Claiming independence Thinking that severing relationships with family will solve problems. We must have relationships to exist. God made us this way.
3. Hosea 2:2-15 Thinking "What's in it for me?" is selfishness. Happiness that is centered on getting "what I deserve". Some people who live on this principle (e.g. Gomer and Israel) are leeches. Why is God/Hosea married to Israel/Gomer? There is no reason for God/Hosea to love Israel/Gomer. They just do. God just does.
The Key: Unselfish Giving, i.e. Giving out of love with strings attached. God is vulnerable and lays His love on the line. That kind of love is more likely to win the human heart.
So there you have it. Thank you patiently reading this, guys. Do you want to know one interesting fact about this lesson? It's my wife's notes. Yes, you heard right -- about 10 years ago (she was 19), she took these very same notes down in a lecture she had. What happened to that awesome, compassionate and hot woman I fell in love with? You can thank myself and her for that.[u][/u]
