Two months ago, H told me that all of his feelings for me were merely sentimental.. because we shared a past, had a child, etc. But that he didn't feel love or passion for me.
Last night, as I laid in bed, h began talking about how he had been thinking. He now says that his feelings for me are still there, and that he is in love with me. I said, "So you feel that these feelings are not just sentimental?" and he said, "I know that I still love you... and that it was there buried under the craziness I was feeling. I know I was not here this summer. I don't understand why."
This is supposed to be THE best thing to happen right? I should be HAPPY. But for some reason I feel...
lost sad worried confused scared and displaced
I know h is very confused, and I know I should not try to rationalize a MLC'R. But HOW does a man go from being SO sure he has NO feelings... to still being in love and having feelings?
It's like a switch flipped, and I'm spinning.
He wants to ML nearly every day. We never even ML that often prior to BD. I don't understand what is happening inside of his heart or mind.
I should be happy, so thankful that H has poked out of the tunnel, but I'm so scared I can't let myself be happy.
I did tell H, when he brought up his craziness, that ... he was completely out of reach and that I could not reach him. And he said, "I know. I was crazy."
