That is what they are paid to do and to make sure you don’t do anything that is not in your best interest.
I’m going thru the same thing right now. Actually have a settlement meeting next week.
Stuff will pop up during this process that she is not going to like and you want to remain as disconnected from that as possible b/c she will take that out on you if you let her…….
What I’m doing and my WW doesn’t even know yet……..she won’t even see me during the meeting…..I’ll be in a separate room.
Make no mistake about this……..this is what they wanted……and lets not forget why you are even at this stage……
Be prepared for anything……it will help you…….run different scenarios thru your head and how you are going to respond to those.
Anything can happen when we are dealing with a WS.
What they seemed so sure of just a few days ago and for months can instantly change.
I have seen it happen on more than one occasion.
Detach as much as possible. It will only benefit you as you go forward with this…..the more you try and work with her……talk with her…….its only going to make it worse.
You need to get yourself to a place where you can remain clear headed and objective as possible about what is best for Aeo.
As for your WW……the future…..who knows.
My guess…….she will reach out again……..as this whole thing dies down…….her friends and the poor support network she does have……will grow tired of it……
Outside of you and your W……no one really cares about your M or why you got D. They may listen……they may support you…..but that situation doesn’t have a major impact on their own life, they won’t put their own life on hold b/c of your WW.
And that is what eventually will get her.
Ever heard of the 80-20 rule? B/c that is what I am talking about here.
She left the M and had an affair……..b/c the 20% she wasn’t receiving from you or the M looked pretty enticing, hence the A partner.
She is still going off that 20%.......but she has yet to realize she just lost the 80%.
And when that happens…….yikes, b/c she has all ready mentioned pieces of this 80%....it just needs to all fall in place……..and life will do that for her.
There is no reason for you to watch or be involved in the train wreck that is coming for her.
It needs to happen in order for her to take a giant step forward in life if she so chooses.
Me:29 WW:26 No kids 2 dogs T: 11 M: 2 D-day 1: 08/2010 D-day 2: 05/2011 1 POSOM Separated: 06/2011 WW ILY commits to M 9/18 Files D 9/19 ILY Still 9/21 WW are fun
