Do I stay or do I go?

[aeolianchaos]

Hey Anyhope,

I would have a plan b in mind.

Not much time, but I want to just say that I hope you do what is best for you and your integrity.

[anyhope]

Thanks for stopping by..

I do have a plan b, which is I'll stay here until he helps me move and if he wants me out, he'll help.

Maybe I'll let him know beforehand that I can only move on the second to see what he says.. Even if he just moves me early in the morning and waits for ow to arrive.. Fine by me.. Doesn't change anything really.

I won't make plans to move without him, the least he can do is help..

[anyhope]

There they are again, on the phone.. Amazing how much they talk all day. H has no work (2nd day in a row) so I get to experience all their conversations, back and back texts.
I tried remembering when I would be on the phone with him years ago, talking about everything and nothing. Where did we end up.. The past year or so all I got was a call around 1-2pm asking if there will be food. I was fed up, nothing more.. Will there be food.. One day I remember I got fed up when I saw him calling as I knew what he was calling for so I asked if he had anything else to say to me besides what's for dinner as I'm a person to and all he calls me for every single day is to ask about food. I must have been on speaker because he asked my brother (they work together) if he really does that. I hear my brother laughing and saying he does.. Then he got upset and started yelling at me that not like I do it.. I don't cook or if I do it's terrible.. This is not true as I used to make food every day since I got a home based job.. The time I didn't cook was when I also worked, or when we first met.. I never cooked for years and he still loved me.. Now I could bend over backwards and it still wouldn't be good enough.. Moving soon, he's still not concerned at all.. In fact I have a feeling they're planning a trip with ow to somewhere. I was still asked to help him prepare his paperwork.. And keep the car insurance on my name as it's cheaper.. But really I'm no good for anything. I told him I don't trust to keep the insurance under my name and have him and ow rally around caring about nothing.. He said she wouldn't drive as she doesn't have proper license, I said I've seen pictures of her on facebook driving our car, so not like that makes a difference.. Not to mention that since this whole thing started in June he must of gotten around $2000 in tickets for various reasons.. I told him that if ow is really as smart and intelligent as he says she is shell be able to help him out.. I got no comment back.. Which is.. What do you say to that.. But knowing myself I'm not sure, I might still do it and help him, but I really shouldn't.

[anyhope]

Oh lord.. He came out to eat with a headset talking to ow. I'm watching x factor ;)) and he puts her on speaker.. So I'm like- do you mind.. I'm watching something.. .so he took the soup to the bedroom.. What an idiot.. Seriously.

[kml]

Oh, H*E*L*L* no!

Really, this is so BEYOND inappropriate, it isn't even funny.


No, he can't stay on your insurance. No, he can't talk to OW in the same room with you. Yes, you need to move out of there ASAP!!!

[anyhope]

Can't be any sooner than the 2nd but its almost here, so thank God. What I think is that he's doing it because we 'broke up' so he has very little consideration for me if any.. He really acts as if I was a roommate of his.. I really waned to say something, but for the time being I was happy with him just going back to his room and other than that I try my best to act as if I don't care.. Which I do.. When it bothers me I come here to read posts, keep my brain focused.. Helps a lot..

[anyhope]

Hello All!
I have now got myself a "new car". I asked a friend who is a mechanic to see it, so he said it's a good buy.. Hopefully.

I had a conversation w h about what I'm taking and such.. I told him I was taking one of the small sofas we have and told him how I'll use it as extra seating when company comes over and will not buy chairs as I originally planned.
He asked if I'll have a housewarming party.. I'm moving to a studio so what kind of party could I have there.. Well.. By the time I said this I saw a sneaky little smile on his face thinking about something, so I asked him what was on his mind. He was thinking if I'd have a housewarming party and if I'd invite him and if his girlfriend could come. So you can all imagine the look on my face, I said you wouldn't be invited to begin with, so the rest comes naturally.
Since the topic was up I figured I'll ask when ow is coming back. I already know she's coming on the 2nd I just wanted to know if he tells me as so far he's been saying he doesn't know when she's coming. He did tell me so I acted like I just found out. I asked him if shell move right in. He said there is no such plan. I asked where she lives now as he told me before that she's from a troubled family and has moved out from home. She lives with her aunt, so I'll bet any money shell move here in no time. He did say she could move here if she helps pay the rent.. So.. I better get used to the idea that she'll be moving here.

[verycrazy]

Anyhope, I have been reading your posts, and I am on my way up there to slap that man around. It may take me a week or so to get there, though. And by then you will be in your new place. Seriously, though if I had the time and gas money...because that guy has more gall than any other person on earth.

Glad you got a good used car, and that you have a friend who's a mechanic.

I can imagine if ow moves in with him, things will get real old real fast. They might be equal in maturity.

BTW, you are one of the best writers on here.
vc

[anyhope]

Thanks Crazy, it means a lot.. He does have some nerves for sure.. At this point I'm kind of switched off and for the most part I try to be as friendy as I can.. Sometimes I just come off as a bitch I know, but oh well.. What do you expect.. Other times I try to make fun of them or ow.. I know I shouldnt but I can't resist. Not sure how he organized in his mind that we're just friends, but he did and did a pretty good job doing it. Yet sometimes I find he's moody, God knows why and tries to pick a fight, correcting things I do.

On two occasions lately I overheard things that were interesting. One the other day when he told ow.. 'seems like you're ignoring me..' guess she said why, because the answer was that he tried calling her quite a few times.. So she said she was sleeping I guess because he said, you couldn't have been sleeping because you sent me text messages.. So that was interesting.

The other was just this evening.. Very similar.. He said I tried calling you all day.. Unsure of the response, but whatever game she's playing she won't be able to once she's here. I'm guessing you're right. Will see how well things go once she's here 24/7. I mean I know that as much fun as she may be.. No man (normal man) would tolerate her long term.

On the other hand I may not be the prefect wife, or anything, but if Ive gotten half the attention ow gets we could have had a happy relationship. You're right though.. H seems to have the brain capacity of a 22 year old for sure so ow no ow I need someone mature to be on my side. All my life I was attracted to older guys as they were more mature and now to have a husband who thinks (or at least acts) like a 20 year old.. No thanks.

Btw thanks for your compliment.. I'm glad you enjoy reading my story..

[verycrazy]

Honey, we all come off as bit*hes at times. And making fun of them is something that (kinda) helps lighten your mood. My teenage S even now likes to mouth ow's name to me when his F isn't looking, and will kick me under the table during dinner when someone with ow's first name is mentioned on tv, which unfortunately happens too often, as ow's name is as common as dog poo. I have almost spit my food out when he does this, but it makes me laugh (inside). That's why I like your writing, I will be reading a post, and feeling sad for you and mad at your H, when you will say something that makes me fall over laughing, especially when you told him to back off the dog.

Hopefully when you are in your new place, maybe it will get easier somewhat to gain some peace of mind. I applaud you for keeping it together when he is so in your face with it all.

You said your H had an ex. Is she an ex GF or W? Was their breakup anything like this? Did he do her the way he is doing you?
vc