GALing and Boundaries with XH

[AJM]

Yikes. Let me set the record straight for just a cotton-picking minute. I LIKE SMART WOMEN. I do NOT like stupid women.

My ex is a dentist. Graduated and divorced me about the same time. But whatever...

My point is that not all men dislike or are intimidated by smart women. Perhaps more on the dating sites do, but I find that I don't meet people that have similar intersts on those sites.

I tried one for a little while. I found that no fun. I found that instead I go to meetup.com events and meet more interesting people. I've met lawyers, doctors, home makers, managers, advertising execs, mechanical engineers, and so on. Some I'm only friends with. Ohters? We hit it off for a while. One of the smartest and I dated for a long while. She's great, but it didn't work out for me. We met at a running event, not online.

Really Antonia, if you ask me, you need to meet people with similar interests. To do that, you need to get out and do the things you like to do. That's where you'll meet somebody worth talking to. Online is fine, but you'll kiss a lot of frogs if you ask me People online tend to lie more often than not and the criteria are so two-dimensional.

And of course your mileage may vary.

You are not a difficult person Antonia. You may be putting a certain "vibe" off to people you meet. I know a friend of mine who is very smart was wondering why guys weren't hitting on her. We talked and I had to point out to her that she wasn't approachable. What was happening is that guys would start to hit on her and she would give them a death stare. Or no time at all. She had her mind going one direction when these guys would approach her and she would miss the signals.

She's great. Really. We're great friends and I think I owe her a drinking binge now that I think about it. Her other friends (gal pals) wouldn't drink Tequila with her so she asked me if I would take her out to drink Tequila shots. I like people like that, but it wasn't always that way with her. Initially she tried to brush me off. I don't pay attention to negative vibes She still laughs about how we met because she was pushing me away and I didn't take no for an answer. Not all men are like that, but many might be. (I haven't been hit on by a guy in many years and prefer to keep it that way).

Smart women are fun and sexy. Stupid women are either acting like somebody else (not sexy) or are no fun to talk to after the initial hello.

Be you Antonia. Let yourself shine through. The rest will follow.

There are tons of fun things to do in that neck of the woods. I don't live that far from that area and can assure you there are plenty of great people on this coast.

AJ