Hi Antonia. Both of your posts really resonated with me.
My xh 'reconnected' with people he used to know, made few new friends etc etc. I think it is all pat of their stuckness.
As to being intimidating - tell me about it. I was a professor, and then worked as a consultant. And I heard all of that stuff about men not liking intelligent women.
And you know? If someone doesn't like who I am I am not pretending to be someone else in order to have a man in my life.
I also believe that we attract people who carry the same amount of damage that we have, so when we are damaged we attract other damaged people, and the healthier we get, the more we attract the less damaged people. And you are right, many of the good guys are married. But not all. A really good friend of mine met and married a widower about 2 years ago. They are incredibly happy, and really value each other. She is a very gifted pianist, and an author, and very bright btw! He is highly intelligent, and really nice. Loves her accomplishments. But that is grown up for you.
So the better you are the less you will attract damaged people, and there are actually men out there who like women with brains. Honestly. Not many [I could make a cheap shot here, but will refrain, with difficulty ]
I believe that God, or the higher power if you aren't religious, but spiritual, will help us if we help ourselves, and that when you are ready for a new relationship you will find one, and it will be great.
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