but you wont do the same

[AJM80]

Thanks! Today was our 7th anniversary, so it was a very difficult weekend. I'm 31, with a 1 and 3 year old, so time alone is hard to come by and so is time with grown ups. My parents took the kids and a girlfriend came in from out of town. We went out and (to quote the Eagles) Drank to Forget.

It feels like a lot to expect any man, even guy friends or family, to really accept and love me in my current position. I know that some of that is the after effects of what H did to me. But some of it is real - I'm still working through a lot of crap and have some serious self defense mechanisms that pop up. Plus I don't have a lot of time/energy to devote to others. When I have time away from the kids, I enjoy it, but they're pretty young and have been through a lot too this year.

What you're saying makes sense. I'm on the fence about whether I have to figure me out 1st or if meeting people/casually dating is part of figuring all this out?
I hope I do find some interesting men to date and don't have too many bad experiences while I figure this out. I'm working out a ton right now, getting in shape for me, for being a role model for the kids, and ....well....I'd rather attract fit, active guys who value taking care of their health.