We had a great day! I was going to take the kids to the pumpkin patch and invited him. The kids were sooooo happy (they love it when we are all together). And H and I had some good laughs and a good day. We were back to treating each other as good friends. We talked about different things and it was nice. Not much eye contact yet, but a couple of times he did look at me when he was talking to me.
I let kids and H choose the pumpkins and he said he'd come carve them with us as a family... He said he had a good time. We then came back and he offered to give girls a bath while I made dinner.
I assumed he would stay and eat with us. That is when things got sad. After bath, he said he was starving and asked if he could eat and run. He had to go do laundry and go buy groceries. (I knew OW was arriving to town that night...) Thruout the afternoon he got increasingly fidgety with the phone - checking texts and messages more and more.
That has been a trigger, but I let it all slide. No comment or anything. It felt good to be in control, knowing that he would be doing that.
Right before he left, he took a call outside. A short one. Then he came back and put the phone down. I could see a text from OW - don't know what it said.
He was in a hurry - gave kids a very quick kiss and left. Things change so quickly when she comes in the picture...
So I feel my choices are -
a) be friendly but go dim / dark, hoping he will miss me. But right now, given how bad our R was, there is not much to miss OR b) treat him as a friend for a while, strengthen our R, so he can have something to miss, and then go dim / dark
Any thoughts or imput will be appreciated. thanks!
Me & H: 44 D7, D6, S3 Together: 20y, M: 17y EA: 11/13/10, Sep: 12/23/10 EA becomes PA: Spring 2011 H filed for D: 09/06/12 D Negotiating began 2/15 OW seemingly gone on 3/15 Still negotiating D
