There you go again, wallowing in your past naivete and misconceptions. What are you doing NOW to achieve your goal, to become the sort of man who would attract this kind of sexually confident woman?
The answer to that is in the first paragraph of my "wallowing" response above. I said, "quite the contrary". I don't appear to have a problem attracting these women. More recently it's just been a case of realizing some opportunities could end up being a lot of trouble.
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Nonetheless, how do you plan to break down your goal into manageable pieces, so you can begin to work toward it? What changes will you need to make?