When life hands you lemons add alcohol and stir!

[mishka422]

To me, this sounds like it is all about you, your feelings about yourself, not about them. It is about your OWN feelings of inadequacy, about things YOU want to change about YOU for YOU.

Ding ding ding...we have a winner. Totally right OT. I've said it before. I have ZERO sense of self-worth. Never have. I work on myself for a while and then life overtakes me and I give it up. Not good, not healthy. It's going to lead to my death sooner than later. I look at my mom's urn on the mantle every day to remind myself where I'm headed if I don't get a handle on my health soon. It's sobering but apparently not enough to make me do better.

Due to the financial situation I gave up weight watchers (which was at least keeping things in check), gave up Zumba, and have been living on pasta and ramen to get by. Not healthy in any way and it has to stop.

Just this last week I made a grocery list only using ww recipes that have relatively cheap ingredients. It still cost too much but it has to be done. I can't eat all that carb loaded crud anymore.

OT, I genuinely got tired of the eye rolling and the griping 'there's always something wrong with you.' statements. So, I keep it to myself. If every muscle in my body hurts and I can barely move without wanting to cry, I say nothing. If I'm throwing up blood, then I may have to say something!

Ironically, he has been whining for the last two weeks about pains. He has a pinched nerve in his shoulder that is causing radiating pain in his neck and arm and he pulled something in the opposite hip. He hasn't slept well in two weeks because of all the pain. I've rubbed him with ben-gay, given him ibuprofen, suggested alternating heat/cold (which he won't do for some dumb reason) but I don't treat him like his being hurt is making me upset with him. I guess that's where my nurturing personality comes into play.

No excuses. I know it's all me (in most ways) but there is only so much I can take without just shutting off in some cases. My own health is one of those places I just have to not share with him. He could care less because it annoys him.