Looking for the silver lining...

[irishblessings]

I just got home from a long weekend - visiting middle D in college - taking S for a college recruitment visit. XH was to have S's car repaired. Called him when we got back to town last night to ask about status - update him on the visit. Civil, ok...

Fast forward - 3pm today in my office - I receive an email from XH:
Numbered 1-10: Items he is unhappy about. He was "hurt" that neither S or myself contacted him about the college visit. Stated that he had to make 3 trips to get the car because the key wasn't where it was supposed to be. I texted him where I thought it was - S put it somewhere else...no conspiracy. XH states "Based on my difficulty finding the key - I am concerned S is being taught to lie in order to cover up mistakes and I don't want that influence on him." !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!WHAT????

Then comes the attachment - mind you, this email was sent to both my son and myself. Attached to the email was a list titled: Top 25 things S must do in order to have access to car and to have $XXXX paid towards his SECOND year of college: what followed was a list of 25 items / how much time S had to spend with XH / how many contacts he had to make / daily routines / grades / etc. My first thought was - "Who is going to pay for his FIRST year of college?" and then "WHO THE H*LL is supposed to monitor the 25 items required for S to have access to the car he was given for his 16th birthday???/"

S is not communicating with his dad. That is not because of me. XH and HIS ATTORNEY wrote the divorce agreement that gives me FULL custody and him parenting time that is..."MUTUALLY AGREED UPON BETWEEN SON AND FATHER". I am NOT involved in those arrangements - nor have I interfered in ANY access!!!!!

I am SO exhausted by this pattern. I reach out, have a civil discussion, and within 24 hours I am SLAMMED with orders from the NARCISSIST who left his only S during his junior year in high school!!! AND to worry about my influence on him regarding LYING-----ARE YOU F'NG KIDDING ME???????????

OW is back on the scene as well - stopping by S's place of employment with his Dad and presenting as though they never broke up. Telling S how hard XH is trying to be a GREAT father.

I apologize for this rant...but I have to purge! Every interaction with X leaves me feeling flattened - I did not respond to the email. I don't know if I will. I can't argue with a lunatic. Nor can I respond to someone with such HIGH standards for everyone else's behavior.

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!