W is moving out.....life goes on...

[In_Shock]

thanks Val. Good insight. I think this is an important point:
"so realize that her words.. is all part of the process.. and whether she knows it or not.. is fear based. Because if was true and you changes genuine.. what reasoning would she then have to leave the marriage? She would either have to find a new one or look deep in herself? The 2nd option - is so much harder!

Yes, I really AM trying to become a better person for me (and actually, so i can be a better mom to S) I really truly want to grow and learn. W wants to run away and start over. Not work on the 13 years.... just GIVE UP!!!! She just cannot believe in the changes.... yes, 25's formula will prove to be true. He!! even if W doesn't EVER believe me, or want me back, perhaps someone will see something worthwhile in me.... Or maybe I will? Work in progress.... Really, if she believed in me and my changes, why leave? Wish she knew how hard I've tried. Wish she knew how much I love her and S. Wish wish wish...... hard damn day. I have no idea why/how W came to have all this power over me and my emotions. It's a MYSTERY.