Well, things have taken a turn. I was out shopping after work when my W texted me. This was the exchange:
W: Hey would it be ok if I came over later this evening? I'm going to see my granny tomorrow.
Me: Sure. What time?
W: Um like 6 or 7? Also do you want to have dinner or something? I feel like some kind of closure would be good.
Me: Nah, that's fine. I've got dinner plans, but I'll be back in time. Just stop by.
W: What dinner plans do you have?
Me: Going to a party.
W: Ok so then what time works for you.
Me: Closer to 7.
W: Well if I'm eating at my parents house we eat at seven.
Me: What are you doing Monday?
W: I'm flying home early in the morning.
Me: Ah, I see. Well, in that case, maybe we could get something to eat. I'll just eat light at the party.
W: Ok I'll be there around 6. We can just order pizza if you want so it'll be fast.
Me: Sounds like a plan.
W: Ok see you then.
Post-text analysis: Did she finagle me good with yet another power play? Yes, I believe she did. She didn't want to just stop by for a couple of minutes; she wanted to poke some more into my life and keep tabs on me.
TBH, I just didn't feel like fighting her about it. I went with my instincts. After all, after this visit, I doubt she'll be very much in my life anymore aside from business about the D, so if she wants to have some pizza, why not indulge her? It's not like my progress can't be regained if this turns out to be a mistake.
So later I'll post about what happened during this little "closure dinner." Not going to lie, my heart sank a little when she wrote that, but not nearly as much as it would have a month ago. For one thing, the future's still wide open. Whatever she says or thinks now may change. I have learned at this point that the words of WAS' are not to be taken as the gospel.
For another, I'm honestly contemplating a happy life without my W. I never thought that I would make it to this point so soon, but I feel as though my little "epiphany" yesterday was me reaching the "acceptance" stage of my loss. I mean, heck, do I really want to have an R with someone who has turned out the way that she has? There's got to be somebody better than that out there for me. If it's not my W after all, I'm looking forward to finding this person.
*shrug* I don't know how to feel. My feelings about everything may change in a week or a month. I am human, after all. We will see where the breeze of life carries me.
