Several of our MFs are pretty angry at my W for her actions or lack thereof. Now that W is coming back for a one week visit, many of our friends are telling me to pull the plug, that she is never coming back, that her mind is made up, and that even if she realizes at some point that she made a mistake by giving up everything here, that she would still never be able to return to her life here, or even a different life here. Are these friends telepathic? Or are you polling them for their opinions? I would stop that. It doesn't help YOU. They mean well b/c they tire of your pain but they have no more idea (indeed they have less) of what your is doing or why. None of us know and, I daresay your w doesn't either.
Our friends are mad that she is stringing me along (there words, not mine). Stop listening to them. To me your w sounds, recently, resolute. Her argument for health insurance may seem selfish but it's not "Stringing you along". On the contrary she sounds as if she's trying hard to be honest now.
They understand why I have been supportive of my W, Do they really? Then why the change? I don't think they understand it much.
but think it is time to end the M. Be done with it, so I can start to heal. IC says the same thing. While I'm sure your IC has been great for you, she's not a DB coach. Guess the real question is why you think filing will heal you. That's like the WAS saying divorce will solve the problems in the m.
Are there financial advantages to you to filing?
The handwriting is on the wall, to be sure, but something just does not feel right. Explore this^^^....what's the rush now? You'll see her soon. Why not make the best of the times you'll have and give her something to miss. Let the good memories we all know DID happen, resurface in her.
W visit here next week is going to be brutal.
It'll be tense unless you choose to make it a great week. See it as an opportunity instead of deathknell.
Find what you still love in her and enjoy that. Embrace the good feelings that do exist, let them brew, and see what happens. Don't expect so much negativity.
Sure, plan for the worst, but let yourself hope for the best (not = expectations), just a streak of optimism that means
whether she's with you or no, you will be fine b/c you are good catch, you are a man only a fool would leave.
Show her that guy!
Let your last contact with her give her some 2nd thoughts so on the dark nights that she's alone, memories will come back to her, & she can recall the man she left - was a man to love...
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
