I sent MIL flowers

[MrBond]

Of course you don't have to follow anyone's suggestions, but right now you're at the same place you are from the get-go.

"c likes to stay focused on solutions not the problem when i go."

I don't think your C is wrong to focus on this. You can't keep focussing on the problem without coming up with a solution. It's why you've been running around in circles. You concentrate too much on what you perceive as the problem (your H) and not enough on what you will actually do to fix that problem.

You can't expect your H to come back if you haven't changed. And you didn't answer that part. What have you changed?

Also, in terms of your financials, you were so worried about your H cutting off your funds since he has the OW. And in actuality, why should he give you money since he has the OW? Are you doing anything to help make your sitch more financially independent?

What happens if the OW tells him not go give you any more money? Then what?