he owned a bread route and i would help him once in awhile ( i always loved helping him no matter what we were doing together), we would go to the grocery store where he delivered, all the woman would flirt with him like i wasnt there. we also owned a health club, the woman there would flirt with him, and one asked him to come to her apt. to help her hang curtains and he went. i found out about that about 3 yrs ago. i didnt trust her. if we were in the car and i was freezing he wouldnt put the heat on for me or if he had the ac on, and i was cold he didnt care, he only cared about his comfort . if we went shopping he would hand me the bags to carry because he didnt want to carry them. when i first met him he got us into legal trouble, he always twisted things around in his head that what he was doing was ok, he never had guilt about anything , which i thought was not normal. another time i had a really good job and he did something illegal even though he got warnings from the co. to stop doing it, and i too, told him to stop, but he wouldn't. he could have gone to federal prison because of it, but they let him quit instead. Does this sound like a narcissist?
factually speaking, he's a criminal and you sound like you enabled him, as have others. He rationalizes his behavior ("twists") and feels no guilt. Hmm...
OTOH, you have never said anythiing like this before. ON the contrary, You've always lauded his wonderful qualities and how generous he is with you and how considerate...and how much you loved him and how happy you two were, and all that stuff.
hard for me to reconcile the two versions of him.
If he did something illegal and serious (not something arguable like hoping the IRS doesn't disagree b/c he made a plausible argument for a deduction that didn't work) that's clearly morally wrong and you witnessed it
that's something you have to factor into who he is. And your acceptance of it is too.
Did it matter before now? If not, why not?
If so, why didn't you ever say anything like this about him before?
RM, if you don't want to answer those questions here, okay.
But at least let me know you read them and that you are thinking of them so I don't feel that the real questions go ignored, okay?
Certainly this side of him explains a lot. I don't know about an MLC so much as just possibly, more of the same with him.
Maybe when He wants something, he takes it and doesn't think the rules apply to him.
Sorry RM
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
