OT, I'm confused by your statement that trust is a team project. My XH has never had reason to mistrust me and will tell you today that I'm the only person in the world that he can trust completely. XH, on the other hand, has betrayed my trust time and time again. Which brings me back to my original statement that XH will have to earn my trust and it will take time .. and it will be on MY time clock.
And if he can do this, then I can - and will - commit to XH.
In any event, I respect your viewpoint but I request that you respect mine as well.