I'm not sure that the last resort is appropriate, then. If you have agreed you are a "couple", though, why is he so weird about being alone with you in public for 20 minutes? I would think that being a "couple" would, at a bare minimum, include dating. I think I would set a once-a-week date as the minimum requirement for him getting to consider you a "couple".
As for him getting feelings for you - he sounds like he has some really serious issues if he's gotten to this age with no relationships longer than 4 months. Do you have any inkling what those might be? Is he willing to go to counseling to figure that out?
I recommend you read the Five Love Languages book. Meanwhile, try to just drop the rope- no pursuing, go happily about your business, be busy with friends and activities.
