OT, you could have told me that rather than having a "convo" with KML that I can "overhear" - that felt odd.
And I thought about what you said -
I think the focus for me, has largely been on me (now I need to make money, now I need to show responsibility, now I need to prove myself, etc.) and also wondering when exBF will every in a blue moon be called on his stuff. Which I know is not DBing, but honestly he has been so abusive to me around money - calling me names, withholding, threatening, that to hear someone say to him "You sounds like you got a lotta fear going on there" whatever it was in relation to made me feel like THANK GOD SOMEONE IS STANDING UP TO HIM - b/c there are never consequences... to him ... and I was too much of a wimp, apparently, b/c I had a D with him, to get up and walk away.
