Grace, Love, Compassion, and Faith

[wawinla]

Reflecting on Tuesday - my w is still clearly angry at me. She says she wants to be fair to both of us, however her idea of fairness changes when it comes to LA.

But I just don't know what to do about it. I validated and apologized but at the end of the day.. those are her demons.

She can continue to use that as a reason for D or her getting more than what is fair or she can deal with those feelings.

It would be her dealing with me.. which again is something she doesn't want to do.

It would be putting me first (in her mind).. which goes against everything she is doing right now.

I don't really know how to DB that. In the rare occasions we do see each other we allow ourselves to be emotional and then she closes back up. She has mentioned many times that there is no point getting emotional, they lead us in circles and it doesn't matter now.

All in all, she's pretty set on her decision not just have a physical divorce, but the emotional one as well. [quote]

V:

I sympathize, my WAW feels EXACTLY the same. To hear repeatedly "it doesn't matter anymore", cuts like a knife.

Under the circumstances, we must accept that all we can do is work on us--to be the best we can be and "protect" ourselves. We can't let our desire for R get in the way of that. Again, much EASIER said then done.

I'll let the more sage folks jump in, but letting your WAS get what they want at your expense....will that really help with R?
Will that help you with becoming a better you?

I'm sorry you're going through this, I know it's not easy.