I feel exactly the same way. The DB way is "don't do it." It's pursuing, it reinforces his decision.

My therapist keeps asking me when I'm going to ask my H how he's feeling, and I keep telling her I don't want to force his hand. I think if he feels he has to make a decision now, it's not going to be one I like.

Why not work on nonverbal things and avoid relationship talks, see how that goes...

Adinva 51, S20, S18
M24 total
6/15/11-12/1/12 From IDLY to H moving out
9/15/15-3/7/17 From negotiating SA to final D at age 50
5/8/17-now: New relationship with an old friend
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Happiness is a warm puppy.