I will try to answer your qustion from "Upsides" thread.
Her husband was in true Withdrawal stage. Your husband is in replay. There is a little difference between the actions of the LBS between these stages.
While your husband is in REPLAY there is really nothing you can DO that will move him through his crisis any faster. You can DETACH and get on with your life and hope and pray that he will make it through.
In UPSIDES case he may have been stuck in withdrawal stage. So the divorce may have pushed him a little bit to get unstuck. I do not believe that you can push your MLC'er at any other time.
I hope that explains it a little better.
This is all explained in the thread that I mentioned in the previous post.
