I had my AA meeting last night all was good, it was interesting to here from a recovering Alcoholic, that when she finally understood what was going on, and told her parents that she was changing, and sorry for the hurt she had caused, they didn't believe her as they had heard it all so many times, and it took a long time for them to accept!!!
So I came out, and called "home", i had some things to drop off for the kids and asked my wife could I take them up and see the kids at the same time, yeah, no problem.
I get there and the kids are excited to see me, we hugged and kissed, as I was leaving my wife asked her to call her when I got home, as I walked away my daughter was shouting," I love you, miss you daddy", and i heard my wife say, " you are seeing him tomorrow, whats up with you"!!!, I ignored it and left.
So I get home and call her, she starts off fine, all polite talking about the kids etc. Then she tells me she has been to see her solicitor regarding the financial stuff, she told him that we had spoken about it, and that we wanted to sort it out with as little upset as possible, he said it was the best way forward, then she said that after speaking to him he has written to my solicitor with an offer of XYZ, this was different to what we had "agreed" in principle, when I told her that, she said that he advised her on this, I didn't need to accept it, but that she wanted it sorting quickly??
I told her why send it, if I can refuse it? I was happy with what we had agreed? She tried to blame the solicitor, but I told her that he worked for her!!! Things got a little heated as we both put our points across, so I just said if we can agree on what we had already "agreed" on I would sign it straight away, she then started to tell me that she hated how I treated people like business deals, and that I wasn't speaking to someone from work?, she said that my abruptness really pi**** her off the most about me?
I tried to explain that I agreed that she and the kids remain in the house, and that the money was just money and business, it was nothing to do with her or the kids?
She then told me that women want to feel protected, and safe, and that I wasn't helping her?? She said that I spoke about us getting back together eventually, and re-married, and that if thats what I truely wanted why was I being so awkward over this????
I just said that I would speak to my solicitor and get back to her, things calmed down. Then she threw in that she wanted it all sorting for Xmas, so we could all have a great Xmas, I said the days of great Xmas were over for the time being, how can they be great with the kids being dragged all over??? She said that Xmas day, is just a day??
I told her I cannot believe what she is saying, it did not sound like her, Xmas was always special, she told me that I had spoilt that!!! Ouch!!!
So we ended calmly, but I cannot help but feel she it trying to emotionaly blackmail me into agreement over money?
Why mention the future? She has never said anything about it in the past, now it is put across as, just sign it for now, because we will be getting together again in the future?? Who can see that happening!!!!
Very Very confused about what to do for the best
I'm suppose to be strong, and caring, but to do that I expose my self financially?
Do I take the risk of us getting back together and everything falling back into place, or is it a cold hard split, and what will be will be, but I will only be upseting her further!!!!
