You sound very good. Work is a great blessing isn't it?
With the WAS - they seem to do a cycle. Flurry of activity, and then radio silence, especially if we talk about our feelings . . . .
I have been thinking about control versus boundaries. It is a fine line, but I think boundaries are about how we want to live our lives, and be treated by others, and control is about how we think/want others to live theirs. So you telling your xh that his actions upset you is a boundary for you, in that you are not in a place where it is comfortable to hear about the festival. [and that is fine]. Giving him guidelines about what you are happy about hearing is helpful imo, because seriously, these people often do not have a clue. It is when we start telling them how to live their lives that I believe is controlling.
A good friend of mine whose xh is also going through a long MLC called me to say her xh called her about some personal problems, and then said, rather resentfully, that she had gotten her life together after all of this, and why was his such a mess? She said it was as if some external agency had caused all of this, not his actions. But the good thing was that we laughed about it for about 5 minutes it was so ludicrous.
Such a blessing when we get to that stage, of seeing how crazy and unrelated to reality they really are.
