Turning Over A New Leaf

[25yearsmlc]

Sorry, 25. I guess I can't say anything more. I feel really trapped, like anything I say from here forward is going to continue to be misconstrued and I'll continue to be bashed; I don't even know how to get out of this at this point. Things have gotten so confusing.

If I go to write, everyone is in such attack mode, waiting for my every word to bash me that even my positive posts (above) are somehow still seen as a joke.

You're doing it again. Did you read my posts Lila, or were they "too long"?

You sure you have nothing to say, b/c you'll just be "attacked"??

That's a pattern right there. Even when you clearly offended someone,

Either you want to "Start fresh" (= "ignore all the stuff I don't like...including questions I won't answer And Or glaring inconsistencies that explain the frustration the posters feel b/c no one understands ME...")

Or you'll withdraw b/c "everyone is attacking ME"...

objectively speaking you need to assess how that would sound if another person wrote it

Your reactions have at least 2 things in common;

1) you don't own a thing you've said or done,

and

2) you repeat your old behavior.

I guess the 3rd thing would be that You are the victim too, no matter what...

Lila, I spent a lot of time giving you specific examples of things that offended or irked people or that hold you back, b/c I don't think you get it.

You admitted that you don't know how you come across.

So I gave you specific examples, (including a significant one in which you offended me)

and now you play victim, saying you are being "bashed" and "attacked" by "everyone".

So.... you won't respond to or answer any questions or make amends...b/c you're being "bashed"....and "everyone is in an attack mode"

If you cannot take ANY form of feedback to help you improve yourself, (outside of us agreeing with your approach,) then you won't improve yourself.

and LBSers have to do that or they'll never get well or change or be happy.

ANd what is the point of us posting?

I have tried the velvet gloves, the gentle encouragement, and the cheerleading approach, but saw nothing change for more than a day or two. Lots of claims of insight and growth...but inevitably when you are tested by events or even ambigious incidents, you over react, you get mad, or play the victim,
You backslide & I see a worsening of your underlying issues vis a vis your ex bf. It scares me and the other posters.

You know at some level you have a problem. You know that posters are frustrated...I say theres a connection.

You risk ignoring us and our feedback at your peril.

Your ex bf said he "tape recorded" you as he took his/your d to his placem which you say was not agreed upon.

Ever wonder what is on that tape? Ever think it might NOT help you?

Ever think you might want to listen to us and change your approach?--

b/c we don't want to see you lose your d.

But I think you could, if you stay on your collision course.

If warning you about your collision course= an "attack" on you, if that's "bashing" you, then things are not going to get better soon, so be it.

Good luck. I think your resistance is among the deepest I've seen. Not a lot I can do about that.