Wife no longer in love with me - Part 4

[cam]

How is YOUR GAL going Cam? Any new friends or any new things you have been doing to help get yourself out of it all? For me, I've been making new friends and hanging out with several. That's a big 180 for me.

I understand how you can question your W noticing your changes if you have NC--- but Cam, I wonder....in your sitch in particular, NC might be a really good option to allow YOU time to heal. If hearing her voice, etc... brings you back to a really bad place inside, perhaps complete silence. No email. No text. No phone. Concentrate on ANYTHING and EVERYTHING that makes Cam Cam -- and that can make Cam happy.

imho you are taking wayyyyyyy too much responsibility for the breakdown of M. Step back and really reflect. The IC should help some with that. And keep posting. I know it helps me a lot to just get it all out!!!!!

Thanks IS.
My GAL is going terribly....I have a lot of friends, but they are all married and have kids or having kids. Being around them makes me sadder as I think about my W so much and miss her. I don't even know how to make new friends, kind of a weird prospect at my age.
I have been busy of late, but I am going to social functions and sporting events for work when I alwasys took my W, and all other people are there as couples - I'm surrounded by it!
I am off to the Maldives next week to go surfing, but going by myself, so I'm not even sure that's the right thing to do spending more time alone, but none of my friends could go because they are all tied up in their lives and marriage.
I hate being alone, I hate living alone, I hate my W not being there when I get home at night.
She's been moved out since February, and to be honest it just gets worse and worse and I miss her more and more. Yet she couldn't give a stuff about me - and that's what hurts so much, as she used to be obsessed with me and adore me.

Last year her birthday card to me said something along the lines of 'i love you so much I cant explain, I'm so happy and proud to be your W and look forward to sharing the rest of our lives together and many more birthdays'. Now its all gone,. She used to say she got butterflies when she saw me after being away for a night, and even when we saw each other after work.
All this stuff she said, and I believed it and now I just think it was all a lie, my family think she used me to leave her crappy life in the States and to get residency in Australia.
As your name suggests, I am in shock and disbelief that this has happened to us.
And to hear her say our R was always a struggle and how all our memories are tainted just breaks my heart.