Time For Change

[MrBond]

You definitely don't have to apologize for posting your feelings. This place was a godsend to me when I first started in my sitch.

The point is that even though she has told you that she wants a D and to move on right now, it doesn't mean that she will always feel that way. Hell read all of the success stories. You'll see that all of the WASs say the same thing.

You're right the only thing you can control is you. But it all comes down to the M. Do you want to save it or not?

If not, then fill out the paperwork and file. If you do, then you have to have the patience and understanding to do so. She's extended an olive branch to you, yet you make it sound like it hurts you? You know she was hurting when she had to deal with your drinking. And that was for years. Do you really think a couple of months is going to be enough to show you've changed your whole life?

And the tattoo issue. You say you want to save the M, yet you have that removed. If I were your W, it tells me you were done and want nothing to do with her. So why all the R and M talk?

Consistent actions. I would suggest to continue going dim. Keep enriching your life and outshine the OM. Your stopping drinking is the first step. Keep that forward momentum going. With each opportunity you have with her, stay upbeat. More importantly, start very subtly "reminding" her of situations where the two of you had a great time together. Keep those going. You'll get resistance at first, but after awhile, she'll accept them.

Increase the positive and reduce the negative.

As for the photo with your D. The photo is for her. I would suggest you do it. Regardless of whether or not your W stay together, she is the D to both of you. She can't change the fact that the two of you are her parents. So let her take a picture with her mother and father. It might help your W start remember the good times again.