Hi vc, yes I do think it's time I moved on even though I love her with all my heart
I had a 3hr conversation today with my wife on the phone, we talked about the past, the hurt she had and the loneliness, the loneliness was the marriage killer
We spoke a out finances for the divorce etc, we will get that sorted in the next few weeks
She spoke about om, basically he is the bandaid for the hurt, it's all " he's a good friend", " we get on really well" etc I just understood why she went the way she did, but I did highlight he was wrong for being in touch while she was married, she said nothing, so she understands
I just said asked how the hell did we get here, she just said that I had worn her down, and I don't understand how hurt she was watching the man she loved isolate her and slowly drink himself to death, and that she can't go back to that,again I understood, but highlighted I was 2 months sober, she accepted that, but said how does she and I know that I won't go back to how I was,again I just understood how she felt but promised to never drink again
We spoke about us, the hurt, I told her how much I missed her, that I was ok, and I'll be fine, but I missed her I told her that at the moment it was no use talking about us as she had a big wall up, that at the moment she didn't like me, but she knew she loved me still, again no answer
We spoke about the kids, I said we need to at least try for them, she said that she understood what I meant, but cannot have her life dictated to by her kids??? This does not sound like her, and sounds like someone else's thoughts??
She ended with she doesn't want to fight anymore and hope we can sort the house and finances out quickly as possible I said we can agree on most things, but I cannot accept another man living in our home while I'm paying for it, she said that she will never live with someone, or remarry again, she was happy living with the kids, and just spending time with someone separately? Not sure she can say that truthfully, but it sounded nice!!
So I do think it's time to move on I love her, I've told her how I feel, we laughed at each , but I think I need to look after me a bit more I have to, have to move on
She sounds happy, and content
I asked her is it hard missing out on the fun I'm having with the kids, she said at times yes, but she also enjoyed having her own space, which is something we both never really had when together, how do I compete with that??
So sad, but I've had some closure from her today
I'll always love her, but I have to accept it's over
