WAH bringing over divorce papers

[MrBond]

Right now you want vengeance which is totally understandable. We all have felt that way. You want to see him writhe and wiggle over hot flames. Unfortunately that's not going to happen. Or at least not by tomorrow.

IMHO here's what you need to do.

Write down what YOU want in the settlement. Time to stop thinking about him and just about you. Put in enough so that you will be taken care of. Regardless of what you request he will be angry. It all comes down to control. He says he wants control of his life. That's fine. But in doing so, he has to understand that he has NO control over you.

DO NOT compromise on what you feel you are entitled to just to appease him because you want him back. If things go through you will be at the short end of the stick. If you have time, consult with a L your options. If you don't have time to do that, then tell him that you are postponing the meeting until you get legal counsel.

He will not like that, but you know what? Tough. Like he says, it's all about him. Well you have no control over that, but you do have control over your actions.

Most importantly, don't let him drive the crazy train. He's been in charge all this time. And now it's time for you to take the wheel of this situation. You are NOT HELPLESS remember that. Even if you need to funnel your anger into action, do it. Just don't let the fear get the best of you. Rise above him.

These are the consequences of his actions. That's what he has to understand. Consequences. Not to punish, but it's a result of what his actions have caused. Stand firm and strong. There's no need to argue with him, however he gets unruly, don't be afraid to walk away. Think of him as a child in a candy store. He knows what he wants and if he doesn't get it, what do children do? They throw a tantrum and blame you for it. Don't fall into that trap. YOu are the adult here. Remember that.