I'm still here x3

[jbnati]

DG - My cell phone company is my land line provider, my ISP and I get DirectTV through them. I think my W and I are going to have to go together to get things split up. Somehow, I've been able to refrain from snooping, although I'm the one that pays the bill right now and she pays me back. I'm the oddball here, mine's Cincinnati Bell. Yeah, I know that gives away my location, but I really haven't made it that much of a mystery.

That Changing Your Life and Everyone In It sounds intriguing. FWIW, I am reading The Rhythm of Life by Matthew Kelly - we gave it to the kids at the Detention Center on the mission trip I went on in July. Somebody wanted me to have a copy. It's a pretty good read to get you pumped up, or at least that's the effect it has on me.

[~¤DG¤~]

JB I admire you in so many ways. Your strength, your kind heart, and your ability to be very positive about things when you would have every right to be bitter and angry.

I promise I won't come to your town to stalk you

It sounds like we both need to be in agreement to transfer the phone over to him. This ought to be interesting given we don't even speak to one another. I will figure something out.....

[~¤DG¤~]

I received a visit from a guardian angel tonight.
My exh's wife showed up at my door with 5 bags of groceries. They know I've been struggling with making ends meet. I was beyond surprised and grateful.

The fact that my ex and his wife would do something like that for me means a lot. It does show that people can get along after divorce. (Although I get along more with his w than with him)

The kids and I are watching the wizard of oz and having a relaxing evening.

[~¤DG¤~]

Journaling-----

Went to bed early and cried myself to sleep last night. I don't know why things seem to be hitting me so hard lately. I wish this feeling of heartbreak would go away.

On monday it is H's 30th bday. I am not going to get him a card or anything, but I will say HB to him, or should I not even do that? He did wish me a HB on my day, I can't seem to do the right thing these days.

Yes, I am aware that I sound like I'm a victim, and that I am having a pity party for myself. Honestly, I really don't care. Like I said to God last night- I know there are millions of people who have things far worse than I do and I am blessed in many ways, but I am hurting beyond belief.

I would rather have pancreatitis every day than the feeling of heartbreak.

Things are really, really tough for me right now.

[LearningPatience]

DG, sorry you are having such a hard time right now. I *completely* understand. I wish I could tell you that the heartbreak completely goes away. It doesn't. The heartbreak feelings do lessen and occur less frequently, but unfortunately they do reoccur from time to time. Just hang in there sweetie, it *will* get better!

I'd acknowledge his bday, but I'd go into it with no expectations. It's just a nice gesture.

((DG))

[paige40]

That is so great your ex wife brought over groceries. How thoughtful of them.

I am so sorry things are so hard for you right now. Seems like it is a few good days then a few bad days huh? I will be around all weekend if you need to talk. I wish I could come over with my boys and watch Wizard of Oz with you! Chin up girl. Lots of love

[ncl]

I'm so very sorry you are struggling right now, DG. Maybe your feelings are a bit more raw since his birthday is coming up. I agree that you should drop him a "Happy Birthday!" text or email as a nice gesture.

What a blessing it was for you to receive that guardian angel at your doorstep! I'm glad you have a full pantry and fridge for the weekend. I hope you are able to find some joy this weekend.

Take care, lc4

[jbnati]

DG, I'm sorry it's a rough day for you. I hope you have a good weekend - you have something to look forward to!

Man, that's unbelievable your XH's W brought over groceries. Wow!

This isn't by the book DB'ing, but I am going to agree with a quick text of "Happy Birthday!" to your H. I think what I've seen, he's going to at least be receptive to it. Keep your expectations low, however. I think there's a very good chance you will hear absolutely nothing back.

[Valeska19]

((DG))
Birthday's are hard. As you know I was a wreck on mine and my w's. I didn't wish her HB, she did me.

I guess it's important to really look at why you would be sending it. Are you sending it out of selfish reasons? Out of fear? Do you have expectations when sending it? How do you think he would be affected by you sending it? or not sending it?

Our sitch's are similar in that our spouses don't contact us. When my w chose to take me out of her life, I chose to respect her wishes. That included her birthday. I didn't do it out of spite, or anger. I did it out of respect of her choice. By doing that.. she also felt the consequence of her action. Not by my hand.. but by her own. She even told me that.

By no means I am saying that is what you should do. But what are your husband's current actions showing you? How is he saying he wants you in his life right now?

Are you afraid he will think you don't care about him if you don't send him something?

[LITB]

(((DG))))

I just wanted to send you a big hug. I hope you are doing better this morning.