PLEASE!!! Need help quick! Calling all vets!

[tadpole1025]

Thanks everyone. Today has been an emotional day. Got a little choked up a few times. It all started last night when I got the blame for "not reminding" her about the paperwork. Then as soon as I got up this morning, another six-page text telling me how terrible I am and saying how anxious she is to be divorced. She even said: "I can't wait until the 14th so this will all be behind us." I think that she thinks that once we are divorced all of her unhappiness will just go away. Of course I didn't respond to it.

Just last week she sent a text telling me how sorry she was for hurting me and now this.

She told me that our marriage was fixable at one point, but I got angry about the internet dating thing. Duh? Wouldn't any spouse get upset to find their partner on an internet dating site?

I just have a hard time grasping how this wonderful woman could actually turn on me. I really do believe that she hates me, despises me......

She actually called S16 this afternoon and asked him if he knew what I "did." (Talking about sending in my paperwork, but not reminding her to do the same.) I'm getting accused of "pulling a fast one." She says that I lie all of the time.

I've never seen anyone so angry and bitter. I think I've got a really mean one folks. I've never heard anyone yell the way she was yelling at me on the phone. It didn't even sound like her. Really.

Bad, bad day for me today.

Tad? Why are you in the dumps amigo? Weren't you, just the other day, saying you wanted her to display the mlc characteristics? Or at least act batty?

Very true AJ. I was because I thought that seeing her being "normal" was harder than putting up with this other crap. I don't know what I believe anymore. I guess I should be careful what I wish for. Beatrice was so right and she warned me ahead of time.

She is about to do something she "knows" you don't deserve (somewhere deep inside).

I don't know man. To her, she is the victim and I am the scum of the earth.

My suggestion? 1) Stop wishing for things you don't want 2) See the craziness of it. The emotional blender that is spewing garbage all over you 3) Embrace it for 5 minutes and then put it in the toilet where it belongs.

I know you're right, but I hang onto her every word and believe everything she says. Why? Because I've believed and trusted her 26 out of my 43 years. I know the "believe nothing they say" rule, but when I hear it over and over, I start to believe it and think that maybe she is just done. Maybe I am a "miserable excuse for a man" like she says.

It'll get worse as you distance yourself.

Can someone explain this? Are you talking about HER and her behavior getting worse? Distancing myself should make her happy. Afterall, she told me to "have a nice life" this morning.

Antonia, you're right. This has been a very big lesson for me.

So she left. So she blames you. So she projects her problems on you (at least when you two talk). Does that surprise you? It doesn't surprise me. When I look at your situation, I see it. I'm sharing that objective view with you so that you see it.

I guess it doesn't surprise me, it just hurts. Maybe I'm too sensitive? I don't know. She is so hurtful with what she says. It is hard to believe that this is the same woman that told me she'd love and be with me forever just a few months before the bomb.

I'm not denying that there were times when she may have been unhappy. But.....she tells me that it has been for years and that she warned me and that she tried and tried for years. I have a hard time with this. I wonder if that is what MLC is telling her or if that is the way it really was and I was just so frickin blind.

She doesnt fill out the paperwork. On purpose, I think. Or maybe not. Then she blames you for not reminding her. What?????

Says that I am being vindictive and trying to pull one over on her. Said: "I thought we were getting along and being cooperative and then you pull sh!t like this! This just shows me that you haven't changed. You are a liar. Liar liar. I was foolish to ever love you and trust you. Stupid me!"

TRY SOMETHING DIFFERENT!

I thought that I was. I really don't know what else to do.

We've been married for 26 years and today I started feeling like the last 15 years have been nothing but a lie.

According to her, this has been coming since 1995.

What took her so long?



Tad