W told me she is done & doesn't love me anymore.

[Snowman]

Well went to my IC today and had to rehash a lot of stuff since it had been 2 weeks or so. I told my IC that I'm detaching and had read the DB book. My IC knew the author immediately and liked that I was letting go. We chatted about what that meant to me and I said just not worrying about her in any aspect. It was a fairly good session.

I know the issue I need to work for me is control. I have tried to control things in my life to provide my self comfort or happiness, at least that was always my intention. As I reflect I know I have smothered my wife and probably not let her do the things she wanted to do. I never had bad intentions just always thought I was doing what was best for my family and she never communicated well to a different fact. I don't want to be that way and that is part of my LRT or 180. I need to just let her do what she is going to do. That is my goal for now.

My wife did come over to get the camera on Sunday even though I didn't know she was coming because I didn't see her text until the garage was already opening. We really didn't talk other than she asked if I saw her text and she asked for the camera which I said it was down stairs. I went to see my son for a second in the car and asked my wife if she needed any more toys for Ian since she complained about that in a text to me.

Anyway I'm trying to go somewhat dark as Gal Man suggested. I have not texted or emailed her unless she texted me first which is usually about my son. It hurts this detaching process but I need to do it as far as I can tell. Thanks for all the good advice on here on keep it coming.