When I started this thread I mentioned uncertainty about being in the right place. I still don't know if I am. She used to be respond to my emails. They have stopped. I know she has returned but is not making contact. I've made some decisions I will try to adhere to: 1) I can not control anyone but myself, so I will stop trying to 2) Sending email/making contact, in an attempt to convince her, isn't working. At most it upsets. So I will stop. 3) My home is littered with memories. Closets filled with cloths, personal effects. Bathroom littered with cosmetics. I will pack them into boxes and store them out of sight. 4) I will stop waiting for her to magically appear. Begin to heel and move on.
"When we renounce our dreams and find peace, we find a short period of tranquility. But dead dreams rot within us and effect our entire being. We become cruel to those around us, and then to ourselves.... And one day, the dead, spoiled dreams make it difficult to breath..." - Paulo
Sometimes I confuse my dreams with those of others. I will make it through the pain and find what I am searching for.
