Do you notice that your interactions start out ok then end tense, with her crying and saying that she's done? Then the next time, they start off well again...then back to the crying, etc. I just get the gut feeling that you should limit these interactions. Say you have to be somewhere and would love to talk for a little while but leave before it gets to the crying. She gets upset and you pursue. Seems like the start of these conversations is your chance to surprise her with your changes and keep things pleasant. How would she react if you said oh, no thanks, no wine for me, I'm in training? or, I really want to know how you are doing but I need to leave by X to go volunteer at the boys center? or I'm watching a friend's kid for little while? (she wants kids right, and is watching to see if you'd be a good dad maybe?) I mean, it should all be true, of course - could be part of your GAL. She sort of did this to you when she showed up in her hot yogi clothes, right? And left you thinking.
Maybe set a limit - three good, positive, light interactions before you let her do the crying thing. Be kind, just have somewhere else you need to be, and tell her....I really want to listen to you and hear you out, but I have to go now. When can we meet up next? or you could come along....(because it's hard to cry out an OR talk in public, in front of people you don't know)
....sorry you're going through this....just trying to give you some ideas....
