OK....got it. No call. You know I just want to understand......what she is doing, why she's doing this, what she's thinking. She has never really explained it to me other than her reasons which don't seem that strong - as everyone we know says; they're not reasons to leave a marriage. If I had an understanding then it would help me to make sense of this horrible situation.
No I'm afraid it would not. Why? B/c there is no reason in your mind & heart that would satisfy you anyhow.
And that assumes SHE knows why.
And that she'd tell you AND that it would be an accurate and lasting description -
but things like emotions change often.
My biggest regret in the whole DB and H/MLC ordeal is how much frickin time I wasted on trying to understand the incomprehensible.
All the "why? How can he? What does it mean? How does HE feel? What is HE thinking/planning/doing??? HIM HIM HIM....blah blah blah!!
when instead, I could have GAL and taken care of my kids and our futures
that much faster.
I wasn't fully present for them or my work when I was obsessing about h's motivations which I STILL don't think HE could explain now.
Even though it's not a tactic to get h back,
in my case I believe detachment helped him wake up some, but I KNOW it sure didn't slow it down.
So the best thing you can do for YOU and or for your M
is to GAL and stop focussing on her....at all...
Detach. READ up on it and DETACH...you won't be "giving up".
The more you pursue and obsess about her now
the more you push her away and the longer it will take for her solo journey to end.
I can't promise you where she'll land when it's over
but I know that your questions are only forcing her to explain and defend and cement her choices more...
stop doing that.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
