I hear ya, Life. Right now it makes you sad. And I think that's appropriate. I really do.
Know what though? Tomorrow, pick yourself up, look yourself in the eye and realize what a wonderfully imperfect person you are. Embrace it. Revel in it. Understand that makes you "normal" and healthy. Gain that perspective that allows you to see that this is not about you nor the kids. This is about your H and his issues. He blames you. Huh. What MLC'r ever did that??
Guess what? That's a human thing. They blame others. But as 25 pointed out, look at the facts. Step back, take a breath and note the facts only. H left. H doesn't try to be a father with the kids (not to be confused with not being a father the way you want) H says he is confused.
Did he leave because you hurt him? Does a parent hurt a four year old? Not usually but they DO get blamed for it anyway by the four year old, right? Like a long drawn out temper trantrum.
Will H miss you? Bigger question is if he will be missed by the time that comes around....
Go back and re-read 25's posts to you. Go back and gain your perspective away from H. If it's one thing I learned along the way its that you cannot trust your spouse once they leave. You really couldn't prior but that's a different story....
Try the story again with the lens of not trusting his words. How does it sound now? What is important in the conversation now?
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
