I have read several site that do not think counceling is the "thing" that is necesary to be able to work things out after an affair. Based on my counceling I believe that. I have stopped going. I do not feel my counceling was helping me. I was getting more from the books and website then I was from the councelor. As far as my H, he has figured out why he had the A. He realized he missed "us". The romance, the spark, the in love feeling we had when we were dating and when we were first married. Before we had the kids and all the worries and stress. The OW clicked with him and he felt that spark and she remined him of those feelings but until he "thought" about it he did not realize it was all about me. He really thought at the time he had fallen in love with his actually soul mate and had the A based on that. He now knows I am the one for him and is committed to us. He is never going to lose site of the team we are and now he will never have another affair since this time he is totally clear on what he has and what he wants.
