Alright just dug up your old thread and read that she point blank told you OM existed and that it WILL get physical. This is a very important piece of information. I bet alot of folks didn't know this here (that's why it's recommended to stick to one thread)
Here's my advice, but wait for others to chime in.
Ok so OM is real and she threw it in your face. Now she wants you to lose money on the house and pay for school. I agree not cool. I (along with other folks I presume) was under the impression that she was still playing the just friends card.
IF she really did tell you that OM is real and that it WILL get physical. It is fair to ask her before deciding to majorly sacrifice for her if she is still seeing OM. She could be too proud to admit that she wants to work on the M and dropped OM and this is her way of letting you know. If on the other hand she says yes then CALMLY inform her that you will not live in a marriage like that and will file as soon as you can.
Expect things to turn UGLY, don't add any ugliness yourself. Let me rephrase that things WILL turn ugly. Yes this is LRT.
It is not to be taken lightly. The key is to not threaten, accuse, or create ultimatums. You are NOT manipulating her. You are telling her that she clearly chooses OM and if she does you will not stick around. Then guess what... You file. If she still doesn't leave OM guess what... You get divorced and move on.
Now there's a chance as all this goes on she snaps out of it, sees how much you changed, and how much she stands to lose and comes back.
Don't count on it. Change for you, and only you. If it wins her back, good if it doesn't oh well.
