Thanks everyone, for your support. I wonder if I'm doing the right thing by being so patient. She is still playing the victim card ("Look how my own son has written me off", "My life is becoming so unglued", etc.) while she continues down her crazy path. IF what she is telling me is true about her "hands off" relationship with the OM, then that means SS21 no longer has his own room at her house, and trust me, that is not good for his happiness and stability.
I can go either way with this. I will hold off on the D for a while, but I could file today if needed, and I wouldn't look back for a second.
H 56 W 48 D27,S21 SS25 SS22 Severely autistic M(#2 for both) 9 1/2 yrs. "I've never loved you" 3/7/2011 Separated 8/7/2011 BITS
Telemark, if you give it a little more time, you will know you did absolutely everything possible to save the M. 5 years down the road, you will be able to tell yourself the same thing. I don't think it's going to take much time, either, as your situation is moving very quickly right now. Her pride is going to make her play the victim role for the time being. (even you and I and almost anybody on this board is going to say, "well, duh") I don't blame you at all for considering the OM situation with a high degree of skepticism, and I think that you should. However, be sure to take all the time you can to continue to work on yourself - I have this feeling that time is going to become scarce.
Sorry I am late to the discussions this week. This is a remarkable turn around for her. But I think all of us on here knew it would happen sooner or later.
I concur with everyone else. Continue to GAL and stay somewhat dark.
Me: 43 W: 37 Together: 18 M: 15 D: 8 yrs old ILYBNILWY: March 2011 She Filed for D: August 2011 She moved out: Sept 1, 2011 Reconciled: May 2012 Divorce Case dropped: July 2012
She could go right back to "Isn't my life just wonderful?" at any time, too, so I am staying very dark, very detached and very protective of my sanity. Her mood swings are so abrupt and so acute that nothing really surprises me at this point.
I also sent an e-mail to SS24 telling him I was sorry he got into the mess with his mother and that I understood his anger and frustration.
H 56 W 48 D27,S21 SS25 SS22 Severely autistic M(#2 for both) 9 1/2 yrs. "I've never loved you" 3/7/2011 Separated 8/7/2011 BITS
I had prepared a Quit Claim to Deed form removing W's name from the house deed. We were supposed to have it notarized together next week. She just texted me, asking if we could put a hold on that, too.
Wish I was a fly on the wall at her house...
H 56 W 48 D27,S21 SS25 SS22 Severely autistic M(#2 for both) 9 1/2 yrs. "I've never loved you" 3/7/2011 Separated 8/7/2011 BITS
Nothing much to add, but I wanted you to know that I am thinking good thoughts for you and hoping that whatever is to come, that you remain as calm and detached as you've been.
You are STRONG - like ox! (I can't remember where that is from.)
I'm trying to get my Ex to sign a quit claim deed as well.
Me: 35 Him: 43 Together: 19 1/2 years 1st Bomb (IDLYAM): March 2011 2nd Bomb (OW): April 2011 He abandons home/bills/everything: May 2011 He's bought a new house for OW: September 2011
