Are there any midlife women who want daily sex?

[TeaEarlGreyHot]

Captain,

the last line is a bit confusing to me. I think ML "Even when" you don't feel like it

often leads to a change of heart.

First, all the evidence from my wife is contrary to what you express. She became less and less willing to making love, much less being sexual, when she didn't feel like it. Ultimately, when given the choice, she made the choice to be completely non-sexual...I've simply allowed her to have her choice for the past 14 years without complaining to her about it. And the only reason it came up at all recently is because she made an accusation that I've "met someone" (her words).

More importantly, I was pointing out an end-game strategy where I hardly consider her accepting sex simply to keep me from leaving is a winning strategy.

I think in the period from 1990 through 1997 was a period where she increasingly "didn't feel like it," and said yes to making love when she did not feel like it. I cannot say for certain whether she enjoyed as I will allow for the possibility that she was feigning enjoyment.

And in the run-up to the "NO MEANS NO!" event on her 51st birthday, there were a number of times where she pushed me away and I just did not persist to maintain some level of domestic tranquility. The frequency of ML, sexual intimacy and even any level of sexual play was dropping rapidly.

She got (and gets) upset when I deal with statistics. And yet she has been dismissive about my "feelings" on this and other things ("it's just a feeling, not reality"). The numbers are objective. I have not attempted to be sexual with anyone outside of this marriage. I have not had sexual intercourse since April 6, 1997. I have not attempted any sexual activity with her since November 11, 1997 because she did not want me to unless we resolved this and then she chose not to be sexual anymore in this marriage in April 1998.

It would be nice if we were in a position of ML even when one or both of us did not feel like it. Unless or until she changes her mind about this or this marriage comes to an end, I see no path out.