Finally confronted H on affair...Now what????

[keep_going]

Journaling...

Thu 9/15 - H's 41st birthday. I had asked a week before if he had plans or wanted to celebrate in any special way. I told him we wanted to celebrate him.

(Even though this might not be a good DB technique, one of his biggest complaints has been that I never celebrated any of his birthdays or made him feel special in any way. So back in April, I did a "late" 40th BD celebration for him and went all out decorating the room, doing a special meal from scratch (I never cook), burned a couple of CDs with specially selected music I knew he would like, got him "old guy" gag presents as well as a couple of gift cards of places I knew he liked, etc. He cried when he thanked me that day... On the other hand, he has not listened to either of the two CDs)

For this birthday, he said he'd like to have lunch with the kids and go to a family fun ctr. to celebrate. I knew that OW would probably have something planned for him, so I decided to be casual and just do whatever he wanted.
He said he was N/A at night and that on Friday night he would also be celebrating with his friends. In other words, OW is here all weekend

Anyways, the lunch celebration was a lot of fun. I made sure I looked really good, but in a casual way. I also had the girls draw some pictures for him as a present and I bought a birthday card that said "Happy Birthday to the best Dad" and signed it as if it was from the kids and not me. I also got him a box of his favorite Sees' candy.

Towards the end of the celebration, he got anxious and fidgety about making sure he would leave by 4pm. It was painful to watch, but I kept my cool and my smile in my face thruout and when he hugged me goodbye I was friendly and wished him happy birthday. As he was walking away, he immediately reached for his phone. At least I was able to remain upbeat while he was present

Twenty minutes later he texted me saying "Thank you so much! That was the best part of my day! I appreciate everything you do for me and the kids."

When I saw the text (an hour later) I replied "you are welcome :)"

Now back to reality:
1) He has been MIA since then...
2) Our real estate agent called me today to say she needs to meet with us re. sale of the townhome - need to have a price reduction and she needs to meet with us ASAP. She complained that H doesn't return her calls. I told her she probably would not hear from him for a couple of days.
Our financial crisis is finally going to come crashing down...
3) I called a Ls office to make an appointment for next week to have a consultation. I was clear I was not ready to file for D. They took down my info to start a file and will call me back to confirm a date and time.
4) Tonight H was going to meet with all our friends (his childhood friends and I guess my ex-friends now) and OW. It's so painful to see how she is slowly taking my place in his life and in our world as they bring their R out in the open. In the meantime, I continue with baby feedings every three hours thru the night...