Angel, maybe our h's are twins? lol I don't know... I think I feel similar to you in that my co depedency is lending to a bigger problem. I don't want to be on the roller coaster, and when I get off I find myself back on.
25, Your advice has truly been helpful... I mean, I'm looking at things in a different way on what I need to be doing just for me. It woke me up.
I was thinking today when I was out for a walk and I wondered about approaching h calmly in a few days and talking to him about my future, as in my possible future alone if things didn't work out. I want to talk to him about my lack of resources here, and how much I want to be standing on my own feet and not lean on him. I want to tell him that, as we go through mc, I'd like to also be in a better position where I'm living in a place that can offer me more. Public transportation, schools for D, (we have to homeschool now), more job opportunities for when I graduate. I have to do my practicum eventually.
I want to ask him if he will consider moving to a more populated area, as we go through mc, and see what happens. Also want to tell him that I wouldn't see the move as a definitive on our relationship. I want him to know he has the door open ... and if he's truly not happy he has an option for himself.
I'm just really afraid of being stuck up here... and I need to be strong ... I don't feel I can be strong up here when there is nothing for me should I need to move on with my own life.
I don't know if this is a bad idea... but I'm brainstorming thinking of d and I.
