OW called our house

[Redo]

E,

Oh man, now i recall about telling you about the NUTs book. Glad it made a difference to him. Definitely did to me.

Have to say something out of my own experience. If your H read that book and said it made a difference, it means that he has lot of issues he need to work on himself first...even before he thinks about family. If you are planning on reconciling, then make sure he does this.

See i had childhood issues that i brought into my marriage. My parents never got along. So i ended up always feeling like a victim, depressed yada yada. Since we got married really early, i never really got a chance to work on myself. Yup, my wife and i had been to lot of MC, but somehow they never really got to the core. I do see some similarity with what you H did. Only difference was that i turned my energies into my hobbies and getting depressed. I guess it is only after W filed for D, i really took a good look at myself and started working on myself.

Your husband first has to find himself. Only then he will let go of his issues, his victimhood and become a strong man who knows what he wants, has his integrity and principles and sticks by them. With that he gains confidence in himself which will allow him to be a great dad and great husband.

If you think he has some childhood issues, then don;t neglect them because right now he is remorseful and things might be okay. But he might slip back into old habits(i know i used to. Because i was too scared to face my issues).

Again, this is just my POV.

Hang in there.