Rysmom, unfortunately, I think that 25yrs may be right, that your H has not filed because of financial reasons. I imagine ow has driven him nuts wanting him to file, so why would he not? He hasn't seen you for a long time. You almost never communicate with him by phone. What else is there to keep him from filing?
I am proud of you for taking the initiative and sending MIL flowers, and speaking with her on the phone. My H was really surprised and happy when I started talking and visiting IL's. He was suspicious at first, but after months and months, he saw it wasn't just to get him back. He did say I was "playing for the jury" once or twice at first.
I would not advise filing for D, because I would not have done it, but if you do live in New Jersey, they have alternatives to that, even if they do not have legal separation. Now, if my H had filed, I would have countersued him on the grounds of adultery.
Rysmom, I hope you are having a nice day. Do you have classes today?
