I had a call this morning from my wife 8.00am, we had agreed that she had the kids tonight as I had a meeting I had to be at work early for tomorrow, telling me that she could not have them tonight as she also had to be at work early.
I told her I had made arrangements and there was nothing I could do, she then started to ask what time I had to leave for work etc, I said around 6.30am, she then said, to drop them off at her house at 6.30am, and that she would sort it out??, so I asked if thats the case, its not about work?, its about tonight!! She denied it at first, but then sort of agreed through gritted teeth!!!
I just lost it a bit then!!!, I know, I know!!!, I told her that her attitude and lies were terrible since the last few days, it was obviously about OM, and that they kids were being pulled all over, that we had got on so well, and I was happy for that, but now it was back to arguing.
I said the OM was a joke just to expect her to be there for her, I knew who he was, and I also knew they stayed in a hotel on Monday, and even told her which hotel it was!
I had an idea which hotel by the conversation and where she said she was on Monday, so I called it yesterday morning, asked to be put through to Mr "my surname" room, and they tried to connect me, and my surname is not common!!!!
She was speachless, asked how I knew, etc, I just told her that some people talk to much!!!
She then said that she didn't tell me any details so I wasn't hurt, she had her own life now and was doing nothing wrong.
She then started to cry saying that I and her parents had been mean to her regarding lying and the kids, and she was sick of it all???
I told her that I had tried to be friends, but it obviously wasn't working and that we should just forget about the daily chats and laughs when he's not around, and hung up.
I sent a text a while later saying "sorry, but I cannot go on like this"
I called her parents to explain we had had an argument again, and explained what had happened.
Her parents are not happy with her at all, they had sensed a change in her for a while, that she was very "up and down", but thought that she was taking advantage of my help and willing, that I should not contact her, and let her get on with it herself. I'm sure they must have read the books!!!!!
The said that the change in her attitude to them, me and the children was terrible, that I should not be so available to her.
They said that they knew something was going on, but now it all made sense, she only asked for their help with childcare with gaps of weeks in between, and that it now made sense, he must be on the scene at these times.
They told me not to call her and look after myself!!
Now because of the past, I'm not their favourite person, but they know I'm trying, and they are concerned about how the kids are being messed about.
They said stop trying to help her, that the OM will soon get sick of the kids care being a problem, they won't be helping as much as usual, and told me to ignore any calls for help from her.
They said that although she was their daughter, they will not stand by and let her harm our children because they are "in the way"!!!
Its nice to know i'm not alone in how I feel!!!
I spoke to her mother and said that I'm hurt that she has changed so much in the past few days, we were getting on great and now this??
Her mother knew exactly how well we had been getting on, that my wife was happy we were friends, that the kids seemed happier, and they actually thought we were heading in the right direction to reconcile, she said that her and my wifes father had spoke yesterday about it all and said that what was happening she seemed confused, and didn't know what she wanted??
This OM works away, and then comes home for a few weeks, his children are grown up so he has no ties. So when he's home he will want to see my wife all the time, hence the kids being in the way, then he goes back, and she wants to be friends again??
There is obviously no future with them, he won't want to take on 2 kids, and my kids will certainly not want to be anywhere near him!, so I don't know??
How can she change so dramatically!!!
When I spoke to her today I asked how could she change like that, she said that maybe she just got too friendly with me??
If I was doing all the calling and she was just being polite I could understand, but hello!!, she called me all the time, she made all the contact, thats not being too friendly, thats having an interest in someone???
So now I'm totally pulled back again, and I mean totally!!!
I don't want to speak to her and I don't like her at the moment.
She is being selfish and self consumming.
I'm concerned about our children, she would do nothing to harm them, but they are now 2nd to OM in her eyes now, but I don't want to step in and make things easier for her like her parents have said.
I know I go on, but I can get loads off my chest here and I feel better afterwards, not for long though!!!!
