Still in the marathon - did I miss a turn?

[jbnati]

Thanks as always, lc4.

Regarding your thoughts on a R talk with your wife...most of the things you have stated as your reasons for wanting to reconcile, I'm guessing she already knows.

Shoot! I think you're right, lc4. I keep going back to this every once in awhile. It's like I'm trying to head off her thoughts of advancing the D process. I think the latest thought process was set off by here looking at a house for herself. I started preparing myself for her applying pressure to me to re-fi the house so she could cash out on the equity.

If you feel like you are at the point where you need a R talk, then I would simply state that you love her and that you are willing to do whatever it takes to save your marriage; however, if she wants a divorce you will respect her decision and do nothing to stop it.

Well, the first part she probably already knows. The latter part is hard for me to say. However, if she really wants a D, there probably not much point trying to go head to head with a WAS who wants a D - it's not going to do anybody any good.

It's real easy for a WAS to talk about getting a new home and getting a divorce, but when it gets down to it, those things are really expensive. With regard to the potential of switching your son's school, I'd cross that bridge when (or rather IF) you get there. No sense arguing about something that isn't happening yet.

You've probably seen a pattern where my W says she's going to do something a little crazy and I start reacting to it, then two weeks she's looking at doing something entirely different. You'd think I'd learn. A little history - she has made several decisions over the years she's regretted. I've learned over the years, too, that I have to let her make some of those decisions and decide for herself whether or not they are good decisions. I'll have to say you're right, there IS no sense in arguing over something that's not imminent.

I think the underlying message, along with LP's is to stay the course for now. I think every once in awhile, I find myself wanting to make sure I am doing everything I possibly can to save my M. I think I'm doing a pretty decent job at saving myself.

Thanks as always, lc4.